Grandpa And The Viagra

Grandpa & Grandma were visiting the kids overnight
when Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in his son's medicine cabinet.

He asked the son about using one of the pills and the son said "I don't
think you should take one; they're very strong and very expensive."

"How much?" asked Grandpa. $10.00 a pill answered the son. "I don't
care" said Grandpa, "I'd like to try one and I'll leave the money under
your pillow as soon as I break this $50.00 bill"

The next morning the son found $110.00 under his pillow. He said to
Grandpa "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00."

"I know" said Grandpa, the extra hundred is from Grandma."

Author Unknown

The Nursing Home

One evening a family brings their frail, elderly mother to a nursing home
and leaves her, hoping she will be well cared for. The next morning, the
nurses bathe her, feed her a tasty breakfast, and set her in a chair at a
window overlooking a lovely flower garden.

She seems OK, but after a while she slowly starts to lean over sideways
in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately rush up to catch her and
straighten her up. Again she seems OK, but after a while she starts to tilt
to the other side. The nurses rush back and once more bring her back upright.
This goes on all morning. Later the family arrives to see how the old woman
is adjusting to her new home. "So Ma, how is it here? Are they treating you
all right?" they ask.

"It's pretty nice," she replies. "Except they won't let you fart."