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Establishing
Rapport
by ResumeEdge.com
The Net's Premier Resume Writing and Editing Service.
With
your qualifications and perhaps the help of a friend, you have
secured your opportunity to sell yourself. Your ability to
connect with the interviewer can cinch the job. Making a good
impression on your interviewer requires more than dressing
sharply, polishing your shoes and being polite. From the moment
you come in sight of the interviewer, you begin the elusive
process of connecting.
Studies show that people tend to remember events better when
they are linked with an emotional impression. Whether the
feelings associated with an event are positive or negative,
emotional connections make the event salient, helping us
remember things more clearly. Making a memorable impression on
the interviewer depends on your ability to connect with the
interviewer.
It helps if your personalities click and you both love to rock
climb, or if you discover you both share the same alma mater and
deeply admire Alan Greenspan. It helps if you have something in
common. With some practice, you need not rely on external or
circumstantial points of mutual reference in order to establish
a good rapport with the interviewer. At a minimum, you can
expect that the interviewer wants you to understand and
appreciate what she is saying-her goals and concerns, position,
expectations and needs.
You can generate good vibes and emotions when you actively
listen to the interviewer. This does not mean that you need to
ask her about her childhood or her greatest fears. Your
interviewer does not need you as a confidant. She just needs to
feel like you are an attentive and engaged interviewee. So, when
you find yourself facing your interviewer across a table (after
you have made certain no stray particles blemish your otherwise
radiant smile), you can be certain she wants to be listened to
and respected.
The active listening skills you can employ to connect with your
interviewer are not unique, but are seldom used. (Think of the
last time someone gave you his undivided, empathetic attention
for an hour!) In some ways these skills are an art - but don't
worry, you can develop the ability with some practice.
Use
empathetic body language.
Both
your words and your behavior will affect whether you establish a
connection with the interviewer. When you meet the potential
employer or human resources officer, you will want to show that
you are confident, trusting, open, attentive, and eager, but
restrained.
All of this can be communicated in a handshake. Make sure that
your hand is about perpendicular to the floor. If you extend
your hand with your palm facing down, you indicate that you need
to be in control-something that can be off-putting in an
interview scenario. If you extend your hand with your palm
facing up, you can appear overly docile. Try extending your hand
with your palm relatively flat, so that you offer to make full
contact with the other person's hand. If you cup your hand, you
indicate that you mistrust the other person.
Likewise, your posture throughout the interview indicates
whether you are open and attentive, or somehow withdrawn from
the interviewer. Leaning back shows boredom or sometimes
insolence. It is better to sit up straight and lean forward just
slightly, facing the interviewer directly. Crossing your arms in
front of you may indicate that you are somehow defensive,
whether from insecurity or mistrust. Try to keep your arms open,
even if your legs are crossed.
Eye contact is crucial. Look the person in the eye when you are
speaking and listening. To avoid giving the interviewer the
impression that you are boring through him with your transfixed
gaze, take breaks and look away to the right or left.
Mirror
the interviewer.
People
feel comfortable when you do the same things that they do,
provided your imitations are not obvious. If the interviewer is
smiling, smile. If the interviewer furrows her brow at a certain
point, do the same. But if the interviewer smokes, don't light
up. Mirroring works not only for behaviors, but also verbal
statements. If you briefly say what you hear when someone else
says it, you show that you are connected. Again, this engaged
listening tool should be used with discretion. Too much can be
awkward.
Example:
The interviewer says: Our company has doubled in personnel and
tripled in revenue over the last five years. The interviewee:
Tripled in revenue. The interviewer: In order to meet the
constraints of the current economy, we are refocusing our
business practices. We have had to reduce the workforce in
some departments without reducing our client load. While this
means that we expect our employees to work more efficiently,
we also intend to equip them for this efficiency by providing
more thorough training and clearer direction. The interviewee:
Employee efficiency is important.
Ask
well-placed, clarifying questions.
If
you do not fully understand something that the interviewer asks
or says, it is best to clarify. Doing so signals to the
interviewer that you are invested in what he or she is saying.
These questions can be tricky, however. If you ask questions
that seek clarification on issues that are tangential to the
thrust of the interviewer's communication, they derail the
person's train of thought and cause people to become defensive
or withdrawn. The interviewer will be convinced that you are not
paying attention if you seek information that has just been
given to you. Before interrupting the interviewer to clarify a
point, make sure that you are listening attentively. Follow the
train of thought of the speaker. Then pose a question.
Example:
I'm sorry, I don't think that I fully understand the reporting
structure for this position. Would I have one or two
supervisors?
Ask
open-ended questions.
Open-ended
questions allow the interviewer to respond as he or she desires
and also demonstrate that you are open to what the interviewer
says. The responses might challenge your assumptions, so they
mitigate miscommunication. They also allow you subtly to steer
the interview in a way that allows you to learn the things you
wish about the company and job. The information you gather from
these questions will assist you in evaluating the company.
Example:
What are the greatest challenges that the person filling this
position will likely encounter?
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